Procrastinating

I have a thing for procrastination. I really do.

Everything in my life has been put off to do later. Okay, maybe not everything. But a lot of things.

What I'm trying to say is that, I have a problem. In fact, this blog post is procrastination in and of itself. I'm supposed to be writing my talk (my farewell talk, in fact) that I'm supposed to be giving in Sacrament Meeting tomorrow morning. Instead, I'm telling you all about how I procrastinate.

If you could get an award for being the absolute worst procrastinator..I'd have it.

s.e.

a rant from a confused fangirl

Fangirl life is one of my favorite things. I can't even explain why. But I love it.

There is, however, one thing I don't understand at all.

Why do the fan-names of an actor all have to have a negative connotation about them? (In all fairness, it isn't all names. But there are some/a lot.)

For example:
Benedict Cumberbatch's fans are "Cumberb****es"
Tom Hiddleston's fans are "Hiddlestoners"
Jensen Ackles' fans are "Ackleholics"

Why can't the names be something nice and happy like the actors themselves, as opposed to revolving around drugs, alcohol, and nasty words?

One of my favorite fan-names is Fabbingtons (the fans of Amanda Abbington.) It's great, because it's still using her name and combining it with the word fabulous. How great, right!?

I think all fan-names should be as such. But I suppose that's just my opinion.

s.e.

a few of my favorite things

• the smells of summer (fresh cut grass, sunscreen, barbecues, outside, etc.) 
• thunder storms (everything about them) 
• cleaning the nursery at the hospital when all the babies are in there 
• runs and yoga 
• driving late at night in the summer with the windows down and the heat on while blasting music 
• workout clothes 
• the color gray 

s.e.

new hair + sunshine + guitar + skyping best friends for an hour and a half.

thank you montana for being so lovely 

thank you home 

thank you friends 

s.e.

The truth is

Pamela and I aren't handling Sierra's departure very well. And by that, I of course mean that one of us is sobbing at all times. (Okay, neither of us is sobbing right now. But any brief reminder as to why we're so sad, and the waterworks are going off. I swear, it's been like Niagra Falls coming out of our eyes all day.)

It's going to rain tonight. Or it looks like it's going to rain. Pamela and I keep looking out the window and saying things like, "I just want it to start raining already so I can make tea, and we can watch sad movies and cry together."

I texted Sierra, and I made it sound like she had died. But with the amount of tears coming out of Pamela and myself, you would think she had died. We are messes.

We'll be skyping her later tonight when she gets back to her home. So that's happy. But it's not going to be the same.

I'm also moving my stuff into Pamela's room, because she doesn't think she can handle being alone/sleeping in the room alone. Really, we are being so crazily dramatic about this you'd think Sierra had died. Really.

Anyway, I just thought I'd write about how I hate goodbyes. They're my least favorite thing ever.

s.e.

In honor of my 50th post....

you get a video of me opening my mission call! Hooray!

I am still so deliriously happy! I can't wait for August!

s.e.

I finally got my mission call!

Yesterday was the happiest day of my life! I got my mission call! Finally. After such an incredibly long time of waiting.

The mail trailer called me at 8:00 am to tell me that my call was there. And I was so excited. I couldn't go back to sleep, even though I was 99% asleep when I was on the phone with them. I knew I wasn't going to be able to open my call until 4:00 pm.

It was the longest day of my life. Seriously, that's the craziest wait is knowing that your call is here but you can't open it yet! I didn't even let myself go to the mail trailer to get it until 3:30 because I'm pretty sure I would have opened it by myself. I would have had a lot of people be really upset with me.

Anyway, so then 4:00 rolled around. And I was having lots of technical difficulties trying to skype my mother. Then it all got worked out and I was able to open it.

I was shaking, and I couldn't breathe. But I was so excited.

So guys! I'm going to the COLORADO DENVER SOUTH MISSION. I'm going Spanish speaking, so I report to the Mexico MTC on August 27. I am so, so, so, excited!
Also, Sierra (mah best friend) and I will be in the MTC together for FOUR WEEKS!!

We are so pumped.

Okay, I'll post a video of me opening it maybe tomorrow? Okay. Bye.

s.e.

day thirty-one

day thirty-one: self portrait and explain what you liked most about this challenge.

There's me. The freckles on my face are already there in abundance. Because it's sunny in Utah. :) Yay for freckles? haha. Also wide eyes and no makeup. :)

What I liked most about this challenge: It got me blogging! It got me reading other people's blogs! It's been a fun 31 day journey! It's kind of crazy that it's over!

Guys! MY MISSION CALL CAME TODAY! So I'll post again later today. Or tomorrow. We'll see how everything goes down.

s.e.

day thirty

day thirty: what's your favorite flavor of ice cream?

My absolute favorite flavor of ice cream is peppermint. Which is a really hard flavor to pick for a favorite since it's only out around Christmas time.

I like lots of different ice creams though. I've only been getting it from the Creamery on campus, so I only get BYU flavors which has actually been lovely. Some of my favorites from there are:

• Earnestly Chocolate (Chocolate ice cream with marshmallow cream, caramel, and caramel cups)
• Peanut Butter Trails
• Mint Cookies & Cream
• Raspberry and Cream Cheese
• Graham Canyon 
• German Chocolate Crunch 

I'm off to study all day, people. Wish me luck. 

s.e.

day twenty-nine

day twenty-nine: what is your favorite time of year and why?

FALL is my number one favorite, and then Spring is a close second. I really love the "in-between" seasons because I don't like extreme temperatures. I hate hot and I hate cold.

Fall is my favorite, because who doesn't love fall colors? PS the fall colors are SO much better in Provo than they are back home. Really. It's lovely. Fall makes me the happiest.

Spring is my close second because it's starting to warm up and the spring colors are beautiful, too, just in a different way.

Spring makes me need to take my allergy medicine every day though. (Curses seasonal allergies.)

GUYS! I'm almost done with this blogging challenge. It's kind of fantastic.

ALSO MY MISSION CALL SHOULD BE COMING TOMORROW!!!! I AM BEYOND ECSTATIC!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

s.e.

Is it terrible that I hate writing assignments...

...that I feel could better be explained just through talking? Because don't get me wrong. I love writing. Really. I do. In my writing class last semester, I absolutely loved my writing assignments, because they had such great purpose and I could see exactly how they fit into the class.

But I'm currently trying to write a paper for psychology. And I'm just wishing that I could just talk about the book we read instead of writing a paper about it. Because sometimes, when it's an assignment, I absolutely loathe writing and the ideas that I have in my head will not come out the way I want them to in paper.

And it's frustrating.

I only have a page left to write now. So I'm going to be okay.

Also, the lunar eclipse is happening tonight. And that's really exciting. Makes the paper writing slightly less painful.

s.e.

day twenty-eight

day twenty-eight: what's your guilty pleasure?

You know, I have been learning (lately) to absolutely loath the term "guilty pleasure." Because if something brings me pleasure or joy or happiness or whatever term you want to use, why would I feel bad about it? Shouldn't I love the things that bring me happiness?

So, I don't have any guilty pleasures. I do have a large number of things that bring me happiness though.

s.e.

day twenty-seven

day twenty-seven: list 3 online friends you've never met, but hope to soon.

Hmm, well, the thing is that I don't have online friends that I've never met. Everyone in my social media realm I have met. And I don't really see that changing anytime soon.

If I could meet people that I follow on Twitter, though, that would be a whole new story. I would love to meet Tom Hiddleston and Amanda Abbington.

I have a thing for British people.

:)

s.e.

day twenty-six

day twenty-six: what is your favorite food?

Italian, Mexican, and Americanized Chinese. :)

Also desserts: ice cream and cheese cake and all desserts really. PAVLOVA.

And carbs. All carbs. Bread. Pasta. All of it.

POPSICLES are my life.

the thing is...

i really LOVE food. 

You can't ask me to pick one favorite. 

s.e.

day twenty-five

day twenty-five: describe your location

I am nestled between a mountain and campus. It's actually a really lovely place. Except they're doing construction outside of my window, and it's REALLY ugly.

In a more broad definition of location: Provo is lovely. I have absolutely loved having the opportunity to live here. I'm kind of in love with Utah. (Nowhere even close to being as pretty as it is back home though.)

And in a narrow definition of location: I'm nestled into a corner of our couch. :) It's my happy place.

s.e.

p.s. I'll write a post about my experience at a concert last night later today.. :)

day twenty-four

day twenty-four: describe your most embarrassing moment

Oh goodness. If you know me, you know that my entire life is composed of one embarrassing moment after another. And I mean that quite literally. So to pick one of those moments and label it as the most embarrassing moment is actually really difficult. Because there's a lot that might reach up to that level. (Really. I could write a book purely on the embarrassing moments in my life. A really big book, guys.)

Okay. The most embarrassing moment I can think of right now is a bit difficult to tell, because it requires that you have a knowledge of the layout of my first high school. I will do my best to explain it, I promise.

My school was set up kind of like an "L" - if you've ever been in an "L" shaped building, you know they're all kind of set up the same way. Generally, in the point where the L meets, there's a big sort of common area thing. In my high school, that's where the office was located AND where any lunch time sale things were happening. (Formal dance tickets, puppy chow sales, what have you...) To get up to the main part of that, you go through the main doors and up like..three steps I think. Then you can go either way, or up another set of stairs to get to whatever class it is you're going to. There is another way to get into the school and to the office area as well. You enter a door on the end of the L, go up a series of slight inclines, and walk straight ahead and you'll get to that area. I promise, all of this is important to the embarrassment of the story. Really.

Okay. Keep all of the above information in mind.

This is my junior year in high school, a pretty rough year for me up until...February/March. I had knee surgery in November that year and had to be on crutches for a month, non-weight-bearing. (Seriously awful.) My high school always holds a winter formal within the first couple weekends of December, and it is a HUGE deal. My sister, Jay, was a senior at the time, so she got put in charge of helping me get around school (because I didn't have friends besides her. This is a very true story.) She was a saint, she really was. And because she was my only friend/in charge of taking care of me, we would eat lunch together. I think we would usually just go sit in the car while eating the lunches our mom had packed for us. Kind of pathetic, but that was my experience in high school. (Which is embarrassing enough as it is.)

So one day, we were walking back into school after lunch. Usually we would walk in through the door at the end of the L and I would walk up the ramps to get to my class, because it was gloriously easy that way. But for some reason that day, we took the main entrance at the intersection point of the L, on a day when they were selling dance tickets. It was the busiest day for sales on those stupid tickets. I swear so many people were hanging out there buying their tickets, or discussing their super great formal plans. I wasn't very good with crutches + stairs, and my sister wasn't paying very close attention to me. I make it up the first two steps perfectly fine. But on the last step, my foot caught on the edge of the stair. My crutches fell out of my hands, my knee was in an immobilizer so I couldn't even do anything to try to stop myself. I fell. On my face. (like a board.) In front of everyone.

After the fall, only my sister and my former biology teacher came to help me. (Jay only helped me after she laughed for a minute, and helped me in fits of laughter.) Everyone else sat there staring/laughing. It was really, really awful. And when you can't move your knee at all, it's hard to get up off the ground. It was awful. Luckily though, my classroom was the first or second room right off the L, so I just got in there as quickly as possible and let my face burn crimson in the shame I felt.

It got worse though. I only had like...two minutes of alone time after the fall to calm myself down. And I don't calm down easily. (My face was bright red for at least an hour after the fall.) People started coming into my class who had witnessed the fall. And they couldn't/wouldn't stop laughing at me. None of them said anything. None of them asked me if I was okay. They just laughed. (Mocking laugh, not fun laugh.) The worst was that my best friend (who was not my best friend at that point, there's a long story with that) laughed at me, too. It hurt. A lot. When we rekindled our friendship in March, we talked about my fall. He still thinks it's hilarious, and I still think he's a jerk for laughing at me. I mean, we'd been through a lot, there was lots of tension between us, but you couldn't have asked if I was okay?

So. That's one of my most embarrassing moments for you. This took me a really long time to write, because the bad feelings came up again. The nightmares of high school are all returning to my mind. (I had a really bad experience. A lot of people say that, but I really did. Maybe I'll tell you about it sometime.)

Okay. Have a good, hopefully non-embarrassing day!

s.e.

day twenty-three

day twenty-three: do you have a hobby?

Good news, gang! I do have hobbies!

1. Guitar 
2. Singing (ranging between really good and really awful. it's a gift.)
3. Netflix marathons 
4. READING 
5. Photography 

There you are, my pets. A sampling of my hobbies. 

I'm under an insane amount of stress today, so I'm keeping this one short. Wish me luck.

s.e.

day twenty-two

day twenty-two: what do you do when you're home all alone?

I'm home alone a good majority of the time. Even if there's one other person in the apartment, they probably are in their room with the door closed (and by that I mean also my room...) and because I'm pretty much not allowed in my room when she is there, I hang out in the kitchen/living area by my lonesome.

In that time, I'm probably watching Netflix or reading a book or doing homework or eating food or cleaning.

That is pretty much the spectrum of things I do when I'm home alone. Though, I'll be honest. About 95% of that time is Netflix + eating. :)

s.e.

Going to BYU....

...makes your computer go a little bit crazy. All of the names from the Book of Mormon aren't registered as real words, so you always end up with the annoying red squiggle under them. It makes me crazy. I just want to be able to do my BOM homework without getting red squiggles!

My computer wanted me to change Moroni to moronic today.

And that just made me sad. 

s.e.

day twenty-one

day twenty-one: what is your biggest fear?

I think right now, my biggest fear is that I'm never going to figure out what I want to do with my life. Meaning what I want to study in school to lead to a career. Basically. Because I've almost completed an entire year of college (which is crazy -- time really flew) without getting any closer to having even an idea of what I might like to do.

And it's just, you know, terrifying to not have any idea at all what you want to study. So, I'd say that's my biggest fear for now.

s.e.

p.s. My declared major right now is Pre-Music. So basically, I wasted away an entire semester before figuring out I didn't want to do that. And you can't become "undeclared" if you've already declared. Is that not the dumbest thing you've ever heard? Because I think it is.

day twenty

day twenty: what do you collect?

I think the word "collect" is weird and I feel like I don't "collect" anything.

That being said: anytime I travel anywhere I buy a Christmas ornament! (: So I have a lovely assortment of Christmas ornaments for someday when I have my own tree to decorate!

in other news: looking back on high school makes me sad.

s.e.

day nineteen

day nineteen: list 5 blogs you read on a regular basis and why.

Weeeeeell. I'm not much of a blog reader, I am sorry to say. There are only two that I've been reading lately.

One: My friend/roommate Courtney's mission blog! She's serving in the France Paris Mission. And she's just absolutely wonderful. (You can read it here.)
Two: My writing teacher from last semester has two blogs that I'm aware of. One blog for serious issues, another blog that's more personal that she writes for her family/friends. Both are fantastic. They can be found (here and here). Both are wonderful. I love her, she's fantastic.

I need to read more blogs, but I just haven't gotten around to searching for some that I want to read. Or have time to read. You know. It's difficult.

have a lovely day!

s.e.

day eighteen + news

day eighteen: where are you happiest?

There's a lot of places where I'm happy. I'm happy when I'm in Provo. I'm happy when I'm in Montana. I"m happy in Idaho.

I think though, there are two places where I'm at my absolute happiest.

1. The Temple. Any Temple. The Spirit felt there is so strong and lovely. Would bring happiness to the most troubled of souls.
2. When I'm about to board a plane/on a plane ready to go on an adventure. The adrenaline, and excitement just knowing you're going to do something amazing. It's a great feeling. 

GUYS! I had an appointment with the urologist today. It went well, my kidneys are fine. Which means... MY MISSION PAPERS ARE BEING PUSHED THROUGH!! 

Today is just a really happy day

!!!!!!!

s.e.

these are my best friends

and i love them a lot. 

like really, a whole lot.

s.e.

day seventeen

day seventeen: why and when did you start blogging?

To answer that question, I'll direct you here. My very first blog post on this blog.

As for now, I'm just trying not to be awful at blogging. It's hard, and I feel like I should have better and more interesting things to talk about.

But All In Good Time.

s.e.

day sixteen

day sixteen: what is your biggest accomplishment?

I honestly think my greatest accomplishment thus far is just growing up to become who I am today.

 High school was really rough on me. I mean really, really rough. I had people pressuring me to be someone I wasn't. It was hard. To this day I'm not entirely sure how I survived.

 But I did. It helped me grow.

Moving to Utah was hard. I didn't know how to be an adult. I didn't know how to take care of myself. I didn't know how to live with 5 girls I had never met before.

But I learned. It helped me grow.

I feel like a majority of my life I was searching to find out who I was. But I always knew. Because it was always inside of me. I should have been searching for the courage to be who I was/am. I had a hard time with that in high school. Now I can't picture myself being anyone else.

I am who I am. I know who I am.

Do you know what else I know?

I know that I'm going to continue growing/learning/changing. And I love it. I'm going to be a really amazing person by the time I get to being an old lady.

s.e.

day fifteen

day fifteen: list ten things that make you awesome.

1. I sing and play guitar. Which, you know, is pretty cool I think. 
2. I am a fangirl, which you will either think is fantastic or weird. So. I think it's great. 
3. I am Mormon! Which I think is super, super cool. 
4. I'm really funny sometimes. Or maybe it's all in my head. But people have been known to laugh when they're with me. 
5. I'm an awkward person, and I am proud of it! If that doesn't make me awesome, I don't know what will! (I have a shirt that says, "Hi, I'm awkward." And I wear it. In public.) 
6. I feel things strongly. It comes with the artistic personality deal. It can be super awesome, or super hard. But generally I think awesome. To feel is an experience, and I just happen to have a lot of it. 
7. I love to read. (i.e. I'm really just a nerd. And this is what John Green has to say about nerds. “…because nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff… Nerds are allowed to love stuff, like jump-up-and-down-in-the-chair-can’t-control-yourself love it. Hank, when people call people nerds, mostly what they’re saying is ‘you like stuff.’ Which is just not a good insult at all. Like, ‘you are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness’.” He also has a quote about how nerd girls are the most underutilized romantic resource. All of which is awesome.) 
8. I love to travel! Hopeless wanderer. Restless heart. You know. All of the things that make me sound like I'd be awful in a relationship. But I'd actually be fantastic. Which has nothing to do with traveling. 
9. I love to laugh! Obviously if a person loves to laugh they're awesome. But I'm also really self-conscious about my laugh. So it's a bit of a problem. 
10. I know who I am as a person! And that is seriously the thing that makes one the absolute most awesome. Because it's a long and difficult journey. And I'm sure I'll obviously grow as a person, so the journey is never really over. But for now, I know who I am, and I am PROUD of who I am. And it's awesome. 

Sorry I got off on little rambles. That's just how I do it. I can't control myself. 

s.e.

days twelve, thirteen, and fourteen

I went out of town for the weekend, and I didn't take my computer. So a late post it is. I know for a fact that not a soul reads my blog though, so I think it's okay. 

Day Twelve: Something that you miss. 

The absolute biggest thing I miss right now is my family. Especially my siblings. It's been amazing for me to be in college, I've grown so much as a person, but I really do miss my family so much. 

Day Thirteen: Do you have any regrets? 

No regrets, only lessons learned. 

Day Fourteen: What's on your iPod? 

Lots of Mumford and Sons. Lana Del Ray. Mixes my best friend Megan made for me. (: Jack Johnson. A lot of various artists. Good music. ;) 

In other news. Tonight is the Finale if How I Met Your Mother. I'm already a mess and I haven't even watched it. 

s.e.

day eleven + ramblings

day eleven: the last book you read

the last book i read was the hundred dresses by eleanor estes. i read that on sunday when the weather was just so nice that i went and laid outside for two hours (and got sunburned). when sierra and i went to barnes and noble this semester, we came home and were just all about reading and reading and reading. she had brought a number of books with her from home so she just gave me several to read and the hundred dresses was in that pile. i hadn't ever read it before, though it appears to be a childhood staple to like...everyone. but i really loved it. would highly recommend it to anyone and everyone.

now for ramblings.

i had a really hard day yesterday. having your mission papers put on hold for medical reasons is really...it just hurts. i cried a lot. i ate nutella. i bought ice cream. my sister had sent me cookies. but nothing helped. i was just so, so sad. and i lost my contact (i think in my eye, but it still hasn't come out, almost 24 hours later). my stomach hurt. i kept crying. no one i've been talking to understands the hurt that i'm feeling, and that hurts. so i prayed. because through the atonement, Jesus Christ knows all of my sorrows.

can we just talk about how amazing that is for a second? Jesus Christ knows every single one of our pains and sorrows, and He knows exactly how to comfort us. and now let's talk about how completely under-utilized and under-rated this specific part of the atonement is. more often than not, that part hardly ever gets mentioned in any discussions of the atonement. (i completely understand why, by the way. but it makes me feel like the atonement has been labeled into parts that are most important and not that important, and i don't know...that doesn't strike me as right, but... i'm sure i could make this very topic into an entire blog post in and of itself, so i'll spare you for now.) the point i'm really trying to get at here is that (in my mind at least) because that part of the atonement doesn't get mentioned all of the time, it also doesn't get remembered all of the time. for me, there are a lot of times when i'll be sad and just want to cry, and eat chocolate anything, and watch sad movies to cry more, and take hot showers while crying, and just be alone and not talk to anyone because no one understands why i'm sad and no one can help me so i just have to get through the sadness alone.

how many times have we all fought through the sorrows and pains by ourselves because we forgot about that part of the atonement? for me, it's been a lot. pretty much every time up to this school year. it's been such a blessing for me to realize that i don't have to go through the sadness alone. it really makes things feel so much easier and lighter.

and i'm not done with the sadness that hit me yesterday. and i probably won't be for a while. a new wave of sadness washes over me every time i see someone post that they got their call. (which is a lot, because i'm in a sister missionary group on facebook...) the whole process of my mission papers has been such a trial. and right now i'm starting to wonder if i'm actually supposed to be going on a mission or if that's just something that i made myself feel because it's what i wanted to do. maybe Heavenly Father has other plans for me. and if He does, that's okay. i know that everything is going to work out how it's supposed to work out. just not in my timetable. and that is okay.

so what i want to take away from this is that it's okay to be sad. it's okay to cry. just remember you never have to go through your pains and sorrows alone. it's all going to be okay.

s.e.

day ten + sad news

day ten: daily routine

so, i'm in college. which means that every day is different, so i don't have much of a daily routine. and i'm honestly not sure anyone would even be interested in reading about it if i did have a daily routine. but here is a sort of template i try to follow.

• wake up. lay in bed in denial that morning is here already. 
• oil pulling (swishing coconut oil for 20 minutes.) followed by a good brushing of the teeth. 
• put on clothes/do hair/put on make up & all that jazz
• go to class 
• when finished with class come home, probably eat. 
• do homework. 
• watch netflix.
• talk with sierra and pamela. 
• go to bed. 

so, ya know, there's that. and for the rest of the blog post...my sad news. 

so my mission papers (that i was so ecstatic to have had turned in? yeahh) have officially been put on hold due to medical reasons. i have to go see a urologist to see if i just pass a lot of kidney stones, or if there's actually some serious and real issues with my kidney. so, you know. that should be fun. been crying for the last 30 minutes. will be crying for the next few weeks. 

this is so hard. 

s.e.

day nine

day nine: what's on your bucket list?

i feel like i have really long responses to all of these prompts. my bucket list is pretty extensive, so i'll just share a few of the things.

• go skydiving (outdoors, i've been indoors and it was amazing. so i need to experience outdoors.)
• go bungee jumping 
• have a paint fight 
• travel everywhere (seriously everywhere...i have an extensive travel bucket list.) 
• become an extremely well read person (i have an extensive book bucket list as well.) 
• get married/have my own family 
• have a harry potter marathon with themed food! (also, have lots of other movie marathons.. lord of the rings.. pirates of the caribbean... disney marathon... i think you get the point.)

honestly...most of my bucket list is travel-related. and i could spend forever listing out every single place i want to go. but i don't have the time for that, and i'm sure you don't have the time to read that. so maybe that's a post for another time. 

on another note. MY BEST FRIEND GOT HER MISSION CALL!! sierra got her mission call today!! she's opening it tonight at 8:30 and i'm ecstatic for her (also jealous that she gets to open hers tonight...but mostly ecstatic.) she's going to be amazing! more later. 

s.e.

day eight

day eight: what is your biggest pet peeve?

hmmm....this is a tough one. i happen to be one of those people with soo many pet peeves.

i think my number one pet peeve is when people mispronounce/misspell my name. because i am convinced that it's really not that hard of a name. it's a weird one, yeah, not very common. but it's not difficult! there are only 8 letters, it's pretty much pronounced how it's spelled and vice versa. really. it shouldn't be that difficult for people. but i swear no one can pronounce or spell it right the first time.

we'll keep this one short, or it'll turn into a crazy rant, and we probably don't want that...

have a lovely day!

s.e.

bonus post: happy news

guys! remember how a little while ago i wrote about how i just wanted my mission papers to go in {i haven't gone back to read it, but i'm sure i was whining and complaining...}

anyway.

MY MISSION PAPERS ARE IN! finally. as of four days ago. so i'm hoping that i'll have a call by next wednesday! {fingers crossed and whatnot} it was such a long journey to get to this point, but i am beyond ecstatic that i will soon find out where i will be serving for 18 months, sharing the gospel with people. seriously. so. ecstatic. and so incredibly blessed to have this opportunity.

you may resume your lives as i continue to celebrate the fact that my papers are in.

s.e.

days four, five, six, and seven

i am sorry, i am so, so sorry. the weekend got the best of me, and i didn't get around to keeping up with my blog challenge. so four in one, yeah? good.

day four: best childhood memory

i think some of my best childhood memories are just when my siblings and i would be playing ridiculous video games on our game cube in our basement, laughing until we cried. because everything was so ridiculously funny. and this still happens from time to time. i have the best siblings. i love them so much, you have no idea.

day five: favorite movies you never get sick of watching

• movies with will ferrell (anchorman, blades of glory, talladega nights, etc.) 
• zoolander 
• the titanic 
• the breakfast club (or really any old 80s movie. they're fantastic)
• any marvel movies 
• a little bit of heaven
• anything and everything disney 
• anything with sandra bullock (the proposal, while you were sleeping, miss congeniality, etc.)
• harry potter movies 
• lord of the rings/the hobbit movies 
• dr. horrible's sing-along blog

there's really a ton more, but i can't think of what they are at the moment. but i love movies. so much. 

day six: your last random act of kindness

i just left my friend kaylie a little note, because i saw that she was having a rough day. :)

day seven: what's your dream job?

i'm sure if i knew what my dream job was, then i would know what i wanted to major in... (cue the stress that inevitably comes with not knowing what one is doing with life..) i think photographer. but i mean, really, the real dream is to marry tom hiddleston, and you know he can provide for us. so i can just travel and just hang out and just be. you know? how perfect would that be? hahaha

okay, so here's why i didn't get around to posting this weekend. (i had a solid weekend, guys.)
friday: i had to go to a concert as homework for my guitar class, then i came home and sierra had made dinner and we watched moulin rouge. which is a perfect movie. watch it.
saturday: pamela and i had to wake up early to go to do some service, to get homework done. we went and cleaned up some horse poop. yum. then came home and showered. then went to cafe rio and iceberg for salad and a nutella shake (respectively). came home again, took a nap. then i had to go to another concert (we are the strike -- seriously, look them up. they're gold.) came home, went to bed.
sunday: went to church. layed in the sun and successfully got my first sunburn of the year (in march guys. what?!) on the back of my knees. so really painful. came inside. took a nap. drake came over and made us korean food, so i helped prepare a bit.. went to a neighbor's to eat cake. went to bed.

so, see, solid weekend. it was fun. so much good food. and on that note, i hope you have a lovely monday/week.

s.e.

day three

day three: what makes you happy?

{guys, this is a beautiful topic for today. i needed it so much. because today i am stressed and pretty much the farthest from happy you can get. so really. i needed this.}

• music!! playing my guitar, singing, listening to it... all of it, i just really freaking love music, okay?! lately i've been listening to a lot of the beatles, billy joel, and the proclaimers. {guys. the proclaimers are fantastic. totally underrated. go listen to them. because really, very fantastic.}
• pinteresting -- i am addicted to pinterest, and it brings me so much joy! 
• sherlockkkkkkk. he's mah holmie. but really, the bbc show is just so amazing. benedict cumberbatch and martin freeman are flawless. also, i really love amanda abbington. guys. the cast is amazing. okay? it's my favorite. 
• doctor who. having a bad day? just watch an episode {or five} of doctor who, and you'll feel better. also, the doctors are all amazing. but the feels. oh my gosh. so many. 
• the office. {i might have a bit of a netflixing problem...} the office is hilarious. i want to marry jim halpert so bad. he's perfect. 
• how i met your mother. because colbie smulders, alyson hannigan, jason segal, jason radnor, and freaking neil patrick harris. nph is mah favorite. 
• tom hiddleston -- pictures of him, gifs of him, watching interviews he's done on youtube, listening to him sing. seriously. tom hiddleston is the dang perfect man. i love him so much. i'm pretty sure he's my soulmate. and that's why i'm never getting married. because my soul mate is 14 years older than me, living in england, and famous. {sobs}
• benedict cumberbatch -- same things as with mah boy tom. :) 
• sierra! sierra makes me really happy. she's the best. 
• and pamela! my best friends are seriously the best best friends anyone could ever ask for. 
• also megan! seriously. my best friends are amazing and wonderful. 
• books make me really ridiculously happy as well. 
• blogging makes me happy, even though i'm not very good at it. 

okay, there's a lot of other things that make me happy. but i think this list is going to be enough for the day. 

so my friends: what makes you happy?

--S.E.

day two

day two: favorite quotes

i have a lot of favorite quotations, so i really shouldn't bother you with all of them. but here are a few.

• "not all those who wander are lost." --j.r.r. tolkein 
• "i guess if you're going to have faith, you can't just have it when the miracles happen. you have to have it when they don't." --this was from an episode of supernatural 
• "i think it's very healthy to spend time alone. you need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person." --oscar wilde 
• "if nothing saves us from death, at least love should save us from life." --pablo neruda 
• "never give up on anyone. and that includes giving up on yourself." --dieter f. uchtdorf 
• "don't you dare, for one more second, surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness you are." 
• "when you do something beautiful and nobody notices, do not be sad. for the sun every morning is a beautiful spectacle and yet most of the audience still sleeps." --john lennon 
• "sometimes i'm terrified of my heart; of its constant hunger for whatever it wants. the way it stops and starts." --edgar allen poe 
• "and in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." --the beatles 
• "it takes courage to grow up and become who you really are." --e.e. cummings 

okay, so there are a few of my favorites! trust me though, there are so many more. i love quotes! so much. but i need to go clean my apartment now -- our drip pans are awful, and we have cleaning checks tomorrow. like serious, hard cleaning checks. wish us luck. 

--S.E.

day one

my roommate/best friend/boyfriend/soul mate sierra (rick) told me that i never update my blog. which is pretty darn true. and i really want to be better about that. like i want to be like john watson with my blog. because he's awesome. also, he's played by martin freeman who is just dang perfect. enough of that rant.

so.

i am starting a 31 day blog challenge. in the middle of the month. because if i don't start now then i know that i never will.

day one: self portrait and five random facts about yourself

{this is me in hawaii with the biggest snow cone of my life.} 

1. i like to pretend that i'm a musician... i have a guitar and i sing. i don't sing seriously anymore, and that kills me every day, i miss it so much. but i dang love playing my guitar and singing {ALONE} because it is such a great release. very therapeutic and whatnot. 
2. i love to travel. i want to travel everywhere. i've gone to australia, new zealand, and hawaii. but i need to do more traveling. it is seriously the greatest thing ever. i have a restless heart and am a hopeless wanderer. 
3. i love to read. but i have a hard time finding the time to read while in college, which is super depressing. i have a book bucket list, books to read throughout my life. and i've planned a "book binge" for the summer. i don't know how much time i'm going to have to read in the summer though, because i don't know when i'll report for my mission! 
4. snow cones are my absolute favorite. i crave them year round, and it's especially bad in the summer for obvious reasons. but really. they're delicious. i could eat them all day every day. the best is coconut + vanilla. 
5. i have turned into a super geek since coming to college. {thank you, rick. you suck.} i am currently obsessed with sherlock, doctor who, the avengers, all marvel movies, dr. horrible's sing-along-blog {actually, adam gets blamed for this one since he's the one that planted the idea in my head}, supernatural, all things tom hiddleston and benedict cumberbatch, and the office. i also have on my list to watch: firefly, charmed, buffy the vampire slayer, merlin, as well as a handful of other things. it's bad. and i have no willpower. in other news: BBC has taken over my life, and has crushed my heart and soul. i'm  never getting over the emotional damage inflicted upon me by the beeb... 

so there you have it. day one: complete. 

--S.E.

trials and appreciation

so i've been having a bit of a hard time latley. my mission papers were supposed to go in on february 9, over a month later and they still aren't in. it's really just been a very frustrating thing, and people feel bad but they don't understand what it's like to be the one who is going through it. i never thought i would be the one going through it, because i got my papers finished in december, all of my medical stuff done in january, so i should have been in the clear to get everything turned in by february 9. but things have just kept going wrong, and not even really wrong, because i'm sure that this is exactly what the Lord wants for me. it's just been a frustrating process.

anyway, the point that i'm really trying to make now is that everything is going to be okay! if everything goes right, my papers should be in by the end of this week. {fingers crossed} i was scrolling on facebook this morning and two people on my newsfeed shared some pictures that i had desperately been needing, and i would like to share them now. 

the pictures really go hand in hand with each other. so i guess what i really want to say right now is that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ know, love, and cherish you. they want what's best for you. they have a time table for you. they can comfort you when you're having hard times, or you're feeling frustrated. they love everyone so much. we are all CHILDREN OF GOD. we all have divine potential. and we all have help along the way to finding ourselves, our potentials. 

i know that my mission papers are going in soon, and you would not believe how much comfort i have felt throughout the process of finally getting them in. i know that there was a reason for my papers not going in when i wanted them to. and because of this trial, i am going to appreciate it so much more when my papers finally do go in..and when i have my call in my hand..and when i report to the mtc..and when i get to the field to share the message of the Gospel of Christ with the people where i will be called to serve. and i can't wait. 

--S.E.